Jan, now I've finally stopped laughing, your remark reminds me of a next-door neighbour of many years ago who was a bit of a hypochondriac. In fairness though, he was one of these unlucky people who seemed to catch anything and everything. His wife used to say that his bedside cabinet was like a miniature branch of Boots the chemist. One thing he was a martyr to was hemeroids, and in the middle of one particular night they were giving him serious gip. He reached out in the dark and fiddled around in his bedside cabinet for the tube of prescribed cream. He carefully applied it and then hit the roof! He ran to the bathroom and sank his nether end in to the wash basin and ran the cold tap full bore.
Yup, you've guessed it. He'd mistakingly picked up a tube of 'Deep Heat.'
That happened over thirty -five years ago, but my eyes still water when I think of it.
Jan, thanks for the laugh, you've made my Monday already.
I dread to think what experiences you have gone through to discover that Deep Heat is an anti-masturbation solution. I rather hope it is hearsay from a monk or monastery. It certainly sounds more effective than a jug of ice cold water.
Of course it was hearsay from one of the Nunnerys actually...the Abbess revealed all in one of her lectures...how to avoid temptations of the flesh , especially of the flesh of the masculine gender member which may stand to attention after the flash of an ankle! lol
One poor Nun thought that Deep Heat was the depths of hell so she sprayed the offender with it!