Don't eat the nuts

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Friday 14 May 2004 9.56am
Spurred on by my good friend Tharg over sausages and cider I have decided to issue a warning about the organic nuts on sale at London Bridge Vaults.

Early one recent saturday I passed through on my way to the station when I spotted a fat pidgeon up to it's knees in organic nuts pecking away as if all his Christmases had come at once. The two nut assistants either hadn't noticed or didn't care. Either way the bird was not moved on and I for one would not be happy to eat nuts that have been waded around in by dirty, filthy winged bringers of pestilence.

I hope this advice will be of some help.



"I knew I was cured"

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