Legal query

Big Dave. Try reading the posts above your own, and particularly the Nursing Standard reference. Then I suggest you consider deleting your post!

Since 1926 there is no legal next of kin.

Mapmaker

1) I asked a polite question, requesting further explanation. There was no need whatever to be patronising and compare me to a 'small child'. This sort of comment only puts people off asking questions or trying to assist others. (I did say at the start that I was not a lawyer.)

2)I did not say that anyone said that you have to give nearest relative as next of kin. As a single person who has been caused some embarrassment by this when going into hospital, however, I just wanted to emphasise the point. People shouldn't be made to feel awkward at times when they are vulnerable and may be feeling isolated anyway.

2)What happened in 1926 or whatever is doubtless fascinating, to lawyers at least, but the main point is that John has got the advice he needed. Nice of him to reply - and polite. OK?

Mapmaker, If i have been inaccurate, then i apologise. There is certainly no need to be rude.

If you are calling a hospital for information on your partner, and you are not married to them, then you are not classed as family or next of kin an d will not be given any information. This actually happened to me.

If your partner is on life support, as an unmarried partner, you have no legal position. If your partner's family do not want you there, then there is nothing that you can do about that.

Big Dave = exactly. Just the point I was trying to make. As you said - if I got things wrong, apologies - we can only do one's best and try to help from our own experience.

If other people know more, thatr's fine - but again as you said - there is no need for them to be rude.

Thanks and good luck - and to John as well.

My flatmate works at King's College Hospital as a Staff Nurse. They have the policy that a decision about a patient can only be made by their next of kin. This is NOT someone that they nominate. It is their partner if married, or their parents, or siblings or children, if over 18. The hospital will not negotiate this, neither will other NHS Trusts across the UK.

This has been part of the reason that Gay Equality campaigners have been fighting for partnership rights. If a gay man is admitted into his intensive care, any decisions made by a long-term partner can be over-ridden by the patient's parents and it is their decision that the NHS Trust would adhere to.

Agreed - it's most unfair, and not only for gay people. Likewise for
straight unmarried people and single people without partners. I'm single and my only relative is my sister, who has her own family, lives miles away and whom I haven't seen for years, and who doesn't have the same religious or other views as I do. Why on earth should she have the power - and the responsibility - of possibly deciding whether I live or die?

I did take legal advice on this befotre I last went into hospital, and was told by a lawyer that I could name anyone I wanted. The NHS Trust's attitude seems to be totally unacceptable. Is it something for the Health Ombudsman? Or the Health Minister or local MP?

This is an important and worrying issue and that it why it should not be dismissed by superficial and discourteous answers.

When my husband was in hospital earlier this year no one discussed with me the possibility that should he have heart/lung failure he should not be resuscitated....they just put it on his nursing notes at the foot of the bed, which I read on a daily basis!

My husband at that time was 'up and off with the fairies' as he had a water infection, was insulin treated diabetic and as they dose was worked out according to ward routine and not food input was very confused anyway. I had a few words with staff and informed them that as his next of kin I would very much like him to be in this world instead of in his box! they said it should not have been put there for me to see...I said I'm glad it was..

I agree with Hilary, the right to end your life if you feel wretched living is your own decision - one to be made feeling fit and compo mentis...
My husband is now in a nursing home, bright as button mentally, still has the MRSA that he contacted on the ward. But has made the choice that should he have heart attack etc. he is not to be revived and has informed the staff of his wishes. Sorry I seemed to have waffled on again...:-( the subject was next of kin now has ended up on voluntary euthanasia ( is that how it's spelt?)

Hilary and Jan, I agree this is a worry and does need to cleared up without prople posting rude remarks.

Jan -

Sounds worrying.
It's not waffling - it's experiences like this - and those of gay couples & single people - that can help (we hope) get the rules changed.
All the best to you and Mr Jan.

Hi, did you hear the Queen's speech about the new policy being introduced to give gay couples the right to register their relationships and gain "next of kin" rights in hospitals?