Monday 15 August 2005 10.35am
Two Mexicans are stuck in the desert, wandering aimlessly and close
to death They are close to just lying down and waiting for the
inevitable, when all of a sudden...
"Hey Pepe, do you smell what I smell. Ees bacon, I is sure of eet".
"Si, Luis, eet smells like bacon to meee".
So, with renewed strength, they struggle off up the next sand dune,
and there, in the distance, is a tree, just loaded with bacon.
There's raw bacon, dripping with moisture, there's fried bacon,
back bacon, double smoked bacon...every imaginable kind of cured
pig meat you can imagine!!
"Pepe, Pepe, we ees saved. Eees a bacon tree".
"Luis, are sure ees not a meerage? We ees in the desert, don'
"Pepe, when deed you ever hear of a meerage that smeell of
bacon...ees no meerage, ees a bacon tree".
And with that...Luis races towards the tree. He gets to within 5
metres, Pepe following closely behind, when all of a sudden, a machine gun
opens up, and Luis is cut down in his tracks. It is clear he is mortally
wounded but, true friend that he is, he manages to warn Pepe with his dying
"Pepe...go back man, you was right, ees not a bacon tree"
"Luis, Luis mi amigo...what ees eet?"
"Pepe...ees not a bacon tree....
Ees, a Ham Bush"