Reviews of Browns

Went last night for a business meeting. The choice of seating caught my eye - small intimate tables or large sofas or high tables near the bar. We had a large table perfect for the 5 of us. There was a man playing a grand piano in the corner - not intrusive and really quite good. The staff were very friendly and their service excellent. We had some bar-snack type food, which was better than expected. I would return and prefer this place to the dreadful All-Bar-One next door. A pleasant evening out.

If only we had read the reviews before we went for a relaxed Sunday get- together by the river with lunch thrown in. Which would have been the best thing to do with it.
Dreadful, perfunctory service and worse food nearly spoiled our day but, on complaining, we were offered a full refund for the price of the food. Horrible roast something which had congealed before the sad- looking vegetables arrived, nasty mean portion of crab and avocado with a depressed dry salad, duck which must have died from old age..... Oh, I can't go on. This place should close.

Decided on a spot of outdoor lunch on Sunday afternoon with my wife and baby.... Went to Browns in Shad Thames. Great seat, great views but that was about it.

We were seated efficiently but then after 10-15 minutes nobody had even bothered to ask us if we wanted a drink. I had to actually get up and go and ask the manager so we could order.

My £5.75 Mojito was very weak, tasted like only the smallest measure of rum.

My wife had the chicken and bacon salad, I had the seafood platter. My wife's salad was awful, no effort put in whatsoever. It was literally a small chicken breast, a bit of bacon and the smallest garnish-sized bit of lettuce. There was hardly any dressing and the overall portion was tiny, and this cost £10. The seafood platter was lame, it was all pre-packaged seafood -limp vacuum packed mackerel, frozen (I'd guess) prawns, tinned crab etc.

My wife then ordered desert and coffee, and they brought her the coffee before the dessert!

I'm not sure if I was expecting too much, but it was generally very poor and I'm not sure if I'd go back.

I'm sorry but £10 for a fish pie which consists of 4 lumps of dryish white fish and 2 lumps of dryish pink fish then a couple of smoked mussles from a tin (and no sign of a prawn as promised)with a dry mash on top garnished with a few Kenyan green beans... I don't think so! Maybe the chef should come over to mine and try a REAL fish pie!

Browns is usually a fairly respectable chain, serving the usual fodder of fish pies, steak and those deep fried 'sharing platters' that have become popular to soak up over-priced wines. For some reason, this particular outlet has, since opening a few years ago, a reputation for the worst service I've ever encountered. Even when it's empty, it takes a ridiculously long time to get served and even longer to get your food. When busy, I suggest you take sandwiches, Kendal Mint Cake and a hip flask. Once the food is served, it's fine, but I can't recommend this place for quality service.