‘I'm baffled by your yellow penis,' the doctor told his patient. ‘Does anyone else in your family have this condition?' The concerned fellow shook his head. ‘Do you handle any chemicals at work?' ‘I don't work. I'm unemployed.' Well, what do you do all day?' ‘Oh, I mostly sit around watching porno movies, eating Quavers.'
A man walks into a pub and orders a drink. He necks it, takes out his c*ck, and p*sses all over the bar. The landlord is furious and tells the man to get out. He apologises profusely, saying he doesn't know what came over him, and that he will see a psychiatrist and get help. A week later, the man goes back into the pub, orders a drink, takes out his c*ck and p*sses all over the bar. Again, the furious landlord tells him to get out, and again the man apologises, and says he will definitely get some help from a psychiatrist for his unusual condition. He then leaves. The following week, the man comes in and the landlord stops him before he can order a drink. ‘It's okay,' says the man, ‘I've been in treatment with my psychiatrist. Everything's fine.' The landlord decides to give the man one more chance, and pulls him a pint. The man drinks it, then gets his c*ck out and p*sses all over the bar. The landlord is stunned. ‘I thought you'd been to see a psychiatrist,' he says. ‘I have,' the man replies. ‘But you've just p*ssed all over my bar again,' the landlord says. ‘I know,' says the man. ‘But I don't feel guilty about it any more.'