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Thursday 22 July 2004 3.33pm

A dyslexic man walks into a bra.....
Anonymous User
Thursday 22 July 2004 4.06pm
An agnostic dyslexic insomniac spent sleepless nights wondering whether or not Dog existed..
Friday 23 July 2004 9.37am
A dyslexic devil worshipper spent 25 years worshipping Santa...

Bien joué...
Friday 23 July 2004 10.03am
‘I'm baffled by your yellow penis,' the doctor told his patient. ‘Does anyone else in your family have this condition?' The concerned fellow shook his head. ‘Do you handle any chemicals at work?' ‘I don't work. I'm unemployed.' Well, what do you do all day?' ‘Oh, I mostly sit around watching porno movies, eating Quavers.'

Bien joué...
Friday 23 July 2004 10.05am
A man walks into a pub and orders a drink. He necks it, takes out his c*ck, and p*sses all over the bar. The landlord is furious and tells the man to get out. He apologises profusely, saying he doesn't know what came over him, and that he will see a psychiatrist and get help. A week later, the man goes back into the pub, orders a drink, takes out his c*ck and p*sses all over the bar. Again, the furious landlord tells him to get out, and again the man apologises, and says he will definitely get some help from a psychiatrist for his unusual condition. He then leaves. The following week, the man comes in and the landlord stops him before he can order a drink. ‘It's okay,' says the man, ‘I've been in treatment with my psychiatrist. Everything's fine.' The landlord decides to give the man one more chance, and pulls him a pint. The man drinks it, then gets his c*ck out and p*sses all over the bar. The landlord is stunned. ‘I thought you'd been to see a psychiatrist,' he says. ‘I have,' the man replies. ‘But you've just p*ssed all over my bar again,' the landlord says. ‘I know,' says the man. ‘But I don't feel guilty about it any more.'

Bien joué...
Friday 23 July 2004 10.09am
What do you get when you cross Fergie with a gorilla?

Don't know. There's only so much you can force a gorilla to do...

Bien joué...
Thursday 29 July 2004 12.32pm
Two paving slabs are in a pub having a drink at their favourite table. In walks Black Tarmac.

'Ooh,' says one paving slab to the other, 'that's Black Tarmac. He's hard as nails he is.'

Black Tarmac gets a drink, walks over to the paving slabs' table and says 'Alright lads, I'm sitting here now. Off you go.'

The paving slabs don't want to argue with Black Tarmac so they go and find another table.

Then Red Tarmac comes in, orders a drink and has a couple of words with Black Tarmac. At which point Black Tarmac gets up and moves to anther table as Red Tarmac sits down.

The paving slabs go over to Black Tarmac and say 'You shouldn't let Red Tarmac boss you around like that. You're hard as nails.'

'Oh I'm hard alright,' Black Tarmac replies, 'but that Red Tarmac's a cycle-path.'

Psychopath? Geddit?
Thursday 29 July 2004 12.55pm
So I was in the library and a girl wlked past with huge folds on the bottom of her trousers.

"There's a turn up for the books ", I thought.
Thursday 29 July 2004 12.59pm
Does anyone know the Noddy Holder/kipper tie joke?
Anonymous User
Thursday 29 July 2004 1.13pm
Milk & two sugars?
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