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Friday afternoon thread

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Friday 7 October 2005 12.29pm
Yes, it was.

Do you ever sleep, Andrew?
Friday 7 October 2005 12.41pm
Not enough. I really should be off to bed now. Have a fab and groovy Friday afternoon and evening. It's goodnight from me and...
Friday 7 October 2005 12.47pm
You'd sleep better, Andrew, if you got the secret of your first gig off your chest ...
Friday 7 October 2005 12.49pm
I agree. Secrets weigh heavily on the conscience.....
Anonymous User
Friday 7 October 2005 12.49pm
This is all a bit structured. Can we revert to the purpose of this thread and introduce some drivel?

Julie, Ivanhoe - I am relying on you!!
Friday 7 October 2005 12.53pm
Thank god work is almost over for another week ...


IN PRISON.. you spend the majority of your time in an 8X10 cell.

AT WORK... you spend the majority of your time in a 6X8 cubicle.


IN PRISON...you get three meals a day.

AT WORK...you only get a break for one meal and you pay for it.


IN PRISON...you get time off for good behaviour.

AT WORK...you get more work for good behaviour.


IN PRISON...the guard locks and unlocks all the doors for you.

AT WORK...you must carry around a security card and open all the doors for yourself.


IN PRISON...you can watch TV and play games.

AT WORK...you get fired for watching TV and playing games.


IN PRISON...you get your own toilet.

AT WORK...you have to share with some idiot who pees on the seat.


IN PRISON...they allow your family and friends to visit.

AT WORK...you can't even speak to your family.


IN PRISON...the taxpayers pay all expenses with no work required.

AT WORK...you get to pay all the expenses to go to work and then they deduct taxes from your salary to pay for prisoners.


IN PRISON...you spend most of your life inside bars wanting to get out.

AT WORK...you spend most of your time wanting to get out and go inside bars.


IN PRISON...you must deal with sadistic wardens.

AT WORK...they are called managers
Friday 7 October 2005 12.55pm
Hahaha - nice tries Julie and TLMJJ. No dice yet...

Birdie, you want drivel, try this:

Donald Rumsfeld is giving the President his daily briefing
on Iraq.

He concludes by saying: "Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers
were killed."

"OH NO!" the President exclaims. "That's terrible!"

His staff sit stunned at this display of emotion, nervously watching as
the President sits, head in hands.

Finally, President looks up and asks, "How many is a brazillion?"
Friday 7 October 2005 12.57pm
Stop me if you've heard this one before...

Q: How many members of the Bush Administration does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A: Ten

1. One to deny that a light bulb needs to be changed.

2. One to attack the patriotism of anyone who says the light bulb needs to be changed.

3. One to blame Clinton for burning out the light bulb.

4. One to tell the nations of the world that they are either for changing the light bulb or for darkness.

5. One to give a billion dollar no-bid contract to Halliburton for the new light bulb.

6. One to arrange a photograph of Bush, dressed as a janitor, standing on a step ladder under the banner: ” Light Bulb Change Accomplished.”

7. One administration insider to resign and write a book documenting in detail how Bush was literally in the dark.

8. One to viciously smear #7.

9. One surrogate to campaign on TV and at rallies on how George Bush has had a strong light-bulb-changing policy all along.

10. And finally, one to confuse Americans about the difference between screwing a light bulb and screwing the country.
Friday 7 October 2005 12.58pm
Andrew Wrote:
-------------------------------------------------------
> Hahaha - nice tries Julie and TLMJJ. No dice
> yet...
>

How about the tiniest smallest wee-ist little clue ...?
Friday 7 October 2005 1.00pm
Night night!
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